They’re queer.  They’re here.  And they’re squirming their way to a Broadway revival near you.  Gay worms!  And no, I’m not talking about the Senator Larry Craigs of the world.  I’m talking about honest to goodness shoe-fearing creepy crawlers.

Scientists at the Brain Institute at the University of Utah (who knew they had brains in Utah?) announced that they had performed a brain-sex change on some unsuspecting nematodes who went on to become cast members in A Chorus Line.

This isn’t news to me.  I’ve dated a few worms in the past.  What’s news is that they did indeed possess brains.

Now can these scientists perform a “brain-sex change” operation on Jake Gyllenhaal?  That would be news.