Sometimes they’re both!

Japanese women are sexy.  They just ooze sex with their hot pink short shorts, impossibly high stiletto heals and mascara.  They look like Cirque de Soleil clown sluts.  True, it’s not a subtle sexiness or a classy sexiness.  It’s more a mid-size American city suburban drag queen’s idea of sexy.

So why is the birth rate plummeting in Japan?  Wouldn’t any red-blooded Japanese salary man just be itching to get home to bang his wife?  Nah.  After work, these guys rush to the men’s room to reapply their hairspray, straighten their blouses and fix their look.

I’ve seen guys peeing next to me in the bathroom and thought, “YOU have a penis!?”

Twice I saw a “guy” enter the men’s locker room at my gym and nearly said, “Excuse me, Miss.  This is the men’s room.”

I’m taken, but that doesn’t prevent me from looking.  If a guy catches my eye, I don’t mind checking him out.  If I get a smile or a look, it makes me feel like I’m 25 again.  “I still got it!” I tell myself.  But that’s back in New York.

Here in Tokyo, things are different.  Guys rarely catch my eye.  I find myself checking out women.  It’s not that these women turn me on.  It’s just fun to check out their take on sexy.  We might have grown out of that imaginative playful stage after the age of nine back in the states, but here in Japan dress up and make believe remain very popular for adults.

The sexy men on Japanese television are found in South Korean soap operas.  Those guys are hot!  Except for Bae Yong Joon from Winter Sonata.  He looks like a middle-age Japanese housewife.  He’s extremely popular with women in Japan.  Go figure.

True, I’m no rice queen.  Never have been.  But I know what I like and Japanese men just don’t have it.