With Texas governor Rick Perry‘s blessing, the Harrold school district north of Fort Worth will begin allowing teachers to carry concealed weapons to school.  Yeehaw!

I used to teach in Texas.  But that was over ten years ago when I wasn’t legally able to take my trusted .44 magnum revolver to school.  Back then, a firm word or a raised eyebrow used to keep my students in line.  There were a few, however, that didn’t always respond to my direction, choosing instead to challenge my authority.  Those evil preteens and demonic teenagers knew full well that my ability to make good on my threats was circumvented by the (then) recent laws set in place to protect children at school.  These were the same laws that brought an end to corporal punishment or the law of the paddle.  Times have changed.  Imagine what I could do now?

“Jose Luis Gomez, I said sit up straight and follow along in the book Goddammit!  Don’t make me waste your sorry ass.”

“Miss Rodriguez, I don’t care how many children you have to take care of at home.  If you don’t complete your homework, you’re going to force me to use my gun.”

Truth be told, my San Antonio students were mostly good kids.  It was when I moved to New York and started teaching middle school in The Bronx that having a concealed weapon would have really come in handy.

“Tamika, if you don’t sit your little smart ass down right this very minute, I’m going to take out my gun and blow an even bigger hole in that ugly little face or yours.”

“Shut up you little muthafucka or I’ll pump you full of lead!”

“I’m just going to aim at your head during your oral presentation.  Remember, I want you to project your voice to the back of the room and nothing angers me more than tears.  Please begin.”

Having lived in Japan for nearly four years, I’ve come to appreciate how safe the streets and schools are in Tokyo.  Japan, like most of our allies in the industrialized world, has very strict and very well enforced laws regarding the sale and possession of fire arms.  A recent Supreme Court decision in the U.S. has challenged existing gun control laws.  We’re going backwards.  Texas is a “leader” in this regard.

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