I love Ellen DeGeneres. Who doesn’t? True, I love my gay gals. But Ellen ranks on top.

While Jodie was still living an open secret of suburban bliss and playing house, Ellen jumped out of the closet and said, “Yep, I’m gay.” While Lang was trolling up the bars and breaking hearts, Ellen tried to make it work publicly with that zany media whore, Heche. While Queen coyly parties with her peeps in Manhattan, Ellen takes Portia out for a night on the town in Hollywood. Let’s face it, Ellen is right up there with Etheridge when it comes to gay saints.

So I was sad to read that Ellen had followed Rosie O’Donnell’s lead and demoted herself from openly gay talk show host to one of a panel of judges. And don’t be fooled, those ladies on The View do nothing but judge. God love ’em. Except that skinny, ultra right-wing Survivor contestant (Barbara, just fire her already. We all know you hate her from the way you look at her).

What was Ellen thinking? Going on American Idol is a lose-lose situation.

No matter how nicey nice and goofy you are, you have put yourself in the roll of judge. If you give a free pass to poor performers and do some shtick, the audience is going to deride you for not being honest. Even Paula could come down hard when necessary.

If you do say something negative about a performance and joke about it, people are going to blast you for not just being a meanie, but a meanie who pokes fun of a performer when he’s down. Your aw shucks likability is going to come off as cruel and dismissive.

Everyone in the gay community (you should see our rec center!) knew Rosie was aggressive, short-tempered and out-spoken before she had her talk show. That’s why we all rolled our eyes when the soccer mom set sat down to watch this hollow persona called Rosie. When we got the tough-talking Rosie “we” all loved when she joined The View is one thing. Ellen has never been known for her aggressive, short-tempered and out-spoken manner. She has nothing to gain and everything to lose by joining American Idol.

Ellen, Baby, rip up the contract and say, “I’m just playin’ guys!” Or you’re going to end up a “mean” lesbian. And mean lesbians don’t keep their day jobs.